Relational Youth Ministry

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In youth ministry we run the risk of being out of balance by failing to consider the varying needs of the young people in our care. Human beings are complex creatures made in the image of God, with different aspects of need, different areas of development. Adolescents often need outside input and influences as they are moving from children to adults - our task is to offer a balanced approach.

Spiritual
Many of you reading this may argue that the purpose of a Christian youth group is to develop the spiritual nature of young people. To provide resources, encouragement and skills to enable them to deepen their relationship with God is our ultimate purpose. However, to solely concentrate on the spiritual side of life at the exclusion of other aspects will greatly diminish the effectiveness of your work.

Of course youth need skills in maintaining an effective prayer life, developing a sustainable method of Bible study. Many need help in recognising God’s voice and planning their future. They need challenging to grow and to speak to their friends about God, to experience worship and receive relevant, contemporary teaching. But they need more than that to develop as whole people and if we don’t provide opportunities for intellectual, emotional and social needs to be met then they will seek those essential resources from outside the group.

Intellectual
During their teenage years the young person moves from thinking in concrete terms to more abstract, they become more curious, begin to have fantasies and display the trend towards a quick turnover of ‘ideas of the week’. They begin to learn by self discovery and may show signs of under valuing the experience of others - especially adults. They begin to question things - beliefs and values - they have held since childhood, they want to think them through for themselves.

It is essential that we give them necessary intellectual stimulation and opportunities for discussion and debate. We need to abandon the safe ground of didactic teaching for the unsure, unchartered waters of discursive methodologies. If we ignore this area of life they will gain their intellectual growth and challenges from non Christian sources.

Emotional
These are times of intense and fluctuating emotions often at the mercy of hormonal change. It can feel like a roller coaster ride along with the pressure of establishing a settled identity. Pressure on all sides to be this or that creates confusion, inconsistency, discouragement and even anger.

Any youth leader will also know that this is a time of intense romantic activity [even if it is only in their head] and often one of a self esteem crisis. We need to offer a space where emotions are accepted and can be displayed, discussed and understood. Teaching on anger - it’s sources and its management, on the changing emotions felt by young people, that big boys DO cry, grief, joy etc. We need to provide listening ears, acceptance and safety. If we don’t then who will?

Social
One of the effects of the changing emotional scene and the need for identity is a desire for a sense of belonging and social acceptance. It is highly relevant which groups you belong to, the parties you are invited to, the independence you are given.

The social life of our groups can go a long way to meeting these needs. It is good to organise inclusive activities (be aware of the different financial capabilities of your young peoples families for example) that provide fun without any of the negatives - cliques or lower moral standards (be careful which films you organise to watch). Some youth leaders use the social activities to encourage existing members to invite their friend - a great idea!

Summary
We need to minister to the whole person and we can provide balance in a young person’s life by offering a balanced youth ministry.